Tuesday, September 11, 2007

I hear the love theme from a Zeffirelli film in my head...

I am smitten. I am obsessed. I can't sleep nights. I keep hitting refresh on my inbox, waiting for replies. I never want to lose this feeling. I love fantasy football.

I thought I would, of course. I'm a numbers guy, I like looking at stats and making predictions, I like competing in things that don't involve running. But I never knew how much it would take me over, like a werewolf bite. It's fantastic.

Understand, first of all, that while I like football, and I like the NFL, I have no great affection for either. I watch maybe an hour or so, idly, on a Sunday afternoon after church. I root for the Pats, though that's hard to do down here in Houston. I watch the playoffs if I can, and of course the Super Bowl (but then, watching the Super Bowl is to being a football fan as... going to a museum is to being a paleontologist. There's a lot more of the former than the latter).

But suddenly... I care deeply about J.P. Losman's uncertain start in Buffalo. I worry about Chad Pennington's ankle injury. I skip around cheerfully at the waiver wire addition of Josh McCown, and I don't even know who Josh McCown is. I rejoice that my Chad Johnson-Reggie Williams-Vernand Morency for Tatum Bell trade, which I had faith in even though it looked mediocre on paper, turned in to such a lopsided stunner (Johnson, Williams, and Morency - two of whom started for his fantasy team - combined for 16 fantasy points. Bell had 29 points all on his own). I still don't seem to know jack about the NFL, and yet all of sudden I feel deep pain that Frank Gore's hand injury disabled him enough that he only ran for 55 yards, which ended up costing me my first game.

Oh, yeah, that's right, I lost my first game. By just 4 points, 279-275. And you want to know why it happened? Because I benched Randy Moss for the first game, figuring he was probably still hurt and wouldn't be any help. Instead, this happened. Yaaay.

My goal, this season, is to learn how to be a fantastic fantasy owner. To make the moves necessary to win, week after week. Honestly, I want to win a fantasy championship my first year out. In fact, I'm going to win a fantasy championship my first year out. And I want you to come along for the ride.

Each week, I'm going to make little updates on this blog, documenting everything happening with my team. And I know, I know, you're not interested, I hear you. But you will be. It's addictive. It's like a virus. You, too, will debate my decision to bench Roy Williams and Shaun McDonald, since they're facing such a tough pair of cornerbacks this week. You, too, will wonder how much Steve McNair's groin injury will impair him in the coming weeks. You think you won't, but you will.

I'll give you a full Week One update in a day or two. Prepare to start caring.



At September 11, 2007 11:43 PM, Blogger Assistant Village Idiot said...

woulda shoulda coulda. Do you have emotional defenses against that?


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